October 2002

Tuesday 22nd October - Saturday 2nd November 2002

Well, that was the fortnight that was...where did we leave off and is it REALLY November?

Aye, Billy's session - thanx to all who wrote with their desert island disks, especially those who provided the correct response - ie 'top of the list would be First Disciple'!! Anyway, even those who didn't list FD, I admire your resolve - and your ability to make a decision! Like I have said to many, my disks would change like the weather, mind you, probably on a desert island the weather is pretty consistent...so, I'd probably just change my mind like a person who changes their mind a lot - when it comes to fave music anyway. Phew, long-winded or what.

Anyway, on with the diatribe (hey, I'm using a lot of big words today aint I?) Pamela's mum has taken an upward turn and is out of HCU or ICU or FBI or CBI or something, and is in 'the ward' so that's a bit of a relief for Pam and her family...I'll keep you posted.


22nd October I know, I know, this is meant to be November but there were a few interesting days in October - honest! Especially this one - I got to meet my colleague in the Paisley Partnership - well nice guy, really approachable, amenable and knowledgeable (he set up the community station, FPR - Ferguslie Park Radio). Anyway, what do you think his name is? Only JAMES DEAN! And I thought he looked familiar too...it was those piercing eyes and that black polo neck jumper...! Not only that, but JAMES DEAN drives a MOPED! Well, meant to work together or what?

What really swung it for me was when I commented on his very sexy balaclava which he uses to keep warm on the bike - 'oh where did you get that?...is it good?...does it work?' I asked. 'Aye' he says and the very next day, does he not come in with a very new, sexy balaclava for ME. Very thoughtful indeed, yes we like him. Only problem is that when I put my sexy balaclava on, I feel the need to do a Superman impersonation - hmmm, maybe I'll wear it to keep warm on the Ferry!!


31st October Just sticking with the job stuff...there was a team building event happening in Drymen for two days. You know one of those paint ball type things. However, the day before, the Chief Executive announced that he was leaving his post at the end of the month - hold on...isn't that today? Yep, he's off...shame really, because I think he was a pivotal character in the organisation. However, those politics aint for me, but a lot of folk in Drymen were rather long of face.

So, the team building...well, what a laugh. The first event was shooting pistols at a wee target. Now, I have a bit of an issue with guns and I think, personally, that the reasons for any aversion is pretty obvious - GUNS KILL PEOPLE, especially kids who find them in bedside tables and under beds, AND lead old actors to feel the need to wear really bad hair pieces so that they feel they look acceptable when it comes to lobbying for the NRA in America. Never mind the guns Charlton, the wig is bad enough.

Anyway...I also have a problem with guns because I remember going to a shooting range in LA with Jane Wiedlin. I hadn't held a real gun and was, actually, pretty excited at the prospect. Basically, all I had to do was show the folk behind the counter some ID, pay them and then walk into the shooting gallery with a Colt Forty Somethingorother with two rounds of ammunition and some ear shields. Well, that was it, McDonalds in a barrel. Bad enough that I had a gun in my hands in a joint that looked like a ten-pin bowling alley, but all these folk had the same thing...sometimes with more bullets, sometimes with bigger guns - in fact, one was a magnum thingy that Dirty Harry used and, apart from being deadly, it was EXCRUTIATINGLY loud. And that was it...you know the type of thing, probably you've seen it in the movies...

So, wee Carol gets all sorted out and fires her first shot at a target, which incidentally, was shaped like a person! Well, that first shot was my last one. I HATED it, not only because the force of the gun forced me to fall backwards, but the whole thing...what was I thinking? Why did I want to hang out in a shooting range, shooting at kid-on people, where I couldn't hear myself think, where I couldn't stand straight after having fired the deadly weapon. What really swung it for me though, was the idea that anyone in that room could have shot everyone else dead and gone out in the street to continue killing people, before anyone knew what was happening. Suffice to say, I left my wee gun and bullets and went out to the street to throw up - ugh - I hate guns.

So, back in Drymen...first activity and Ed, the ex-marines guy who wore combats FOR PLEASURE, asked if anyone had an aversion to guns. Of course I said me, but, not to worry, these weren't real guns, just kinda air pistol type guns...'oh aye'! So, I had a go, it was teambuilding after all. Ed gave us a few trial runs and then said he was going to give us scores and that 'grouping' was all important, that is, you had to try to aim your pellets at the same area. Well, once again, wee Carol gets all sorted out and becomes Cagney, Lacey, Starsky AND Hutch and fires 8 pellets practically into the same hole - oh my god, I'm a crack shot. And, that wasn't just beginners luck, which I had put it down to initially, but the next day I was even better - hmm, very worrying! Ed said that in all the events he had run like this one, he hadn't seen a better shot. I am slightly concerned that I feel a little proud of this statistic, I was the one who HATED guns. Maybe I need some therapy!

I was semi-bragging about my shooting prowess to my pal Emma. 'Yeah, I'm on a team building thingmybobber and I had the best shot and blah blah blah and me, me, me and I'm great...', at which point Emma said pointedly 'Carol, in 'team building', there is no such thing as 'I''. Well, that wiz me telt!!!

That night, there was a big massive sing-song with almost all employees hanging out, yep, I'm liking this Paisley Partnership lark.


1st November Well, it was gig time in Edinburgh, at the CABARET BAR AT THE PLEASANCE. I remember playing there before and there were very few people there. This time I played and there were slightly more than very few people there. And, I gotta tell you, it was so much fun.

Jan, who runs the gig is very persistent and very kind. Its not often you go to a gig and there is a lovely rider all set out in the dressing room, with fruit and fresh towels and all. This is the one! As well as good rider, there was also a great wee team there to help out. Trav the sound guy was really helpful, as was Paula, who very kindly sold the merchandise for me, in the absence of Julie and Judy, my usual team.

Only Big Stuart and I were playing that night...sadly Alby's uncle had passed away and the funeral was that day, Wee Stuart had to go to London and Pamela was sharing some QT with her mum.

For the first time on this tour we had an opener...a real folksy type guy called PETER MICHEAL ROWAN. Very entertaining, with some gorgeous songs and a beautiful wee boy called Sieme (pronounced Shamey). So the night was off to a good start.

I had received an e-mail before from James McCormack who said that his friend was coming and it would be his 50th CL gig and would I say hello. Well, its not usually my thing, to say hello (usually because I'd forget) but I did this night...of course this was only self-serving and I only remembered because it was to do with me! However, I said hello to Paul telling the crowd that this was his 50th CL gig...but Paul didn't answer - because he wasn't there! Someone piped up 'oh, his 50th carol laula gig...and he's missed it!'. The tone of the night was set. There was a lot of banter with the crowd (just for a change) and it was MAGIC. I (foolishly) asked what folk preferred 'the acoustic thing or the band thing'. Now, maybe its just me, but if someone was on stage with only another guitarist in tow PLAYING AN ACOUSTIC gig, I think I would answer the question somewhat diplomatically...did the Edinburgh-ers? Eh, NAW! 'BAND' came the hasty response - I think even my mum showed that self-same support! Hmm...with fans like these...!

Just a wee aside on the James McCormack story...yesterday (Friday) I was driving about town in a pretty shoddy fashion - I never profess to being a good driver and I didn't have the moped to blame, this was in a bona-fide, warm, dry car. Anyway, I pulled in at the bank and some guy in a black BMW (I think) stared into the car as if to say 'ya stupit numpty, that's no flipping way to drive' Well, I had parked like a maniac! So, I was in the bank, doing the business, getting English notes to spend in England and stuff...and I spotted the guy who had stared so menacingly into my car. I kept my head down as I walked out, only to be stopped by this, very tall man. Of course, I was expecting to be told how to drive and to have ownership of the road explained to me etc and the big tall man said 'excuse me, can I get a word with you Carol, I'm sorry we couldn't make the gig last Friday...' It was James McCormack! How weird is that? Unless, of course, he is a stalker. But no, I know he aint and how cool was it that he wanted to explain - and apologise - for not having made the gig in Edinburgh (I wish you well with your current situation Jim). Either way, hello to Paul, I hope you will be at the gig in the Ferry - thanx for coming to see me 50 times AND thanx for counting!!


2nd November There is something weird going on with me - I can sleep for hours, like, lots of hours...maybe ten or twelve on the trot - is that wierd to anyone?

So, I FINALLY got out of bed to get myself ready to go to St Andrews. Two good things were happening here - my wee sis Julie Pie was coming AND so was Pamela. Thankfully things with her mum were looking up.

We set off at around 3...just about the time the rain started, oh yes, and the wind - oh joy! Usually it is such a beautiful drive but today is was just dark, wet and windy - but what a laugh we had in the car, that and chips!

So, got to the gig. THE BYRE THEATRE in St Andrews. It is absolutely beautiful, a state of the art theatre where there has obviously been a lot of money spend, not just on fixtures and fittings, but also on decent staff. From the minute we went in the front door, we were treated like royalty. The sound guy, Niel, and the lighting guy, Mickey were great, really professional. It may not make a tangible difference to folk who come along and listen to the show, but I think it sets a great atmosphere for the performers if there is an easy and conducive working atmosphere. This was certainly the place.

Prince William didn't make it, but you know what, there wasn't room for him. It was a great wee crowd, some old fans, like Mr and Mrs Tracey, and some new ones, like the three American girls who just happened to get tickets on spec. They loved it and the appreciation that people show, makes the whole thing, not only worth it, but so much more magical and special. I know, I know, I sound like an old romantic, but it really makes a lot of difference to me as a performer to know that I am reaching new places and people.

Big Stuart ended up like an old sot, it was a real laugh. He asked David to bring him a glass of wine on stage once, then twice, then the third time David just brought the bottle on and left it at Stuart's side. Needless to say, Stuart made short work of it. I've never been able to do that thing where I can drink and give a good performance I don't think, but I gotta tell you, Stuart played a blinder. Pam too, without the aid of booze, was in fine fettle and like I say, without those guys, Johnny, Wee Stuart and Alby too, I would be absolutely mediocre. Not only do I get to sound good with those guys, but it makes a pretty good time even better!

On the way back home, we had some 88 mile per hour gusts to contend with...why oh why didn't we just stay overnight - think of all those extra hours sleep I could have had!


And that's really it for now...I have next week in London, which I am SO looking forward to - not only do I get to play with Nick Harper, I get to play in London AND I get to hang out with my beautiful pals Sacha, Chris and their daughter Ruby. They live in a bit of a palace in Balham - life's tough eh?

So I think by day, I will finish off those songs I've been going on about, and by night I will be either a singer or a vampire - its a tough choice.

Since the weekend, I have had an up and down week. I CAN'T BELIEVE George W Bush has managed to get where he is. It saddens and scares me that such a person can be where he is today. I think he is a warmongering, gun toting nutcase who will kill too many people just because he isn't exactly sure of what his job description is. But, as ever, its not for me to say...we put people in power to listen to us and when they get there, they don't listen to us! Worse still, it seems that no-one but a faulty chad counter and a brother-in-Florida gave George W his power. To my mind, misplaced power = misplaced consequences. Anyway, I'd better stop else the FBI or CAI will be coming to visit.

On a happy note, I called Gwen to see if she got herself a baby and all I could hear down the telephone was her, smiling. She, and hubby, are over the mood at having had a wee baby boy. Well done girl! Hey, maybe I could get permission and have Jo mount a picture of the baby on the web...we'll see.

Oh, and the moped hairy for this time is...Ms Laula, braves the Clyde Tunnel again (probably the last time). She drives along Dumbarton Road viewing some red traffic lights up ahead, therefore, driving fairly slowly. Then, a large transit van sits up her jacksy, revving the engine and sounding the horn - apparently remembering the powers of Knightrider. Eh...? Where d'ya want me to go ya muppet, its a red light and there are parked cars on the inside. However, transit van man continued to harrass wee moped gal. Then it happened...he didn't actually want to overtake me and drive off into the sunset. No, he wanted to overtake me and then PARK on the inside lane, just to nip into the all important grocery shop. Eh...are you mental?

However, he did manage to cut me up on the inside lane and park. So, van guy got out, obviously VERY angry with having been held up on his milk round. I was sporting my very sexy balaclava so he couldn't see my face and he said, through gritted teeth and bright-red-vein-throbbing face 'ye don't own the road pal'. Okay...be calm Carol...just you tell him...'And you neither' oooooh. At which point the guy realised I was female (fortunate that he noticed eh?!). Now I don't know if this softened his approach, you know, like, if I'd been a guy who answered him back, he'd have hit me. However, he walked over to the bike, with the same gritted teeth and bright-red-vein-throbbing face and said 'what's the speed limit here?', 'Thirty miles per hour' I stated all smart and brazen...'aye, thirty, no twenty' and off he marched. I said after him to 'have a nice day'. And, you know, this all sounds light and jovial and no big thing, but I gotta tell you, I was pretty shakey afterwards. Not because of what happened, but because of what might have happened. Why are people so intollerent? So Angry all the time? and so caught up in their own thing? I know I say this a lot, but see if we only helped each other out a bit more, took more time with each other...I don't know. Sometimes it gets me down!

My pal reckons I should take down the number plates of those who harass me, but I don't know, that sounds like such a waste of energy on negativaty...we'll see. Plus, how am I going to write and drive the moped at the same time?

Anyway folks, gotta go. It 6.30 pm and I need my 15 hourse of sleep before I go to London tomorrow! Hopefully see you at one, two, three OR FOUR of the shows I have next week.

Carol


Thursday 10th October - Saturday 20th October 2002

So, where we...oh yes, the love dilemma. Well, some people suggested that as Juaquin canny speak any English that I should stick with Bobby D - good conversation, deep, meaningful and heartwrenching discussions about politics (I believe Bob is a Democrat)...well, you see...I don't know about that one - I wasn't looking for deep conversation, just a very substantial overview of Juaquin's six pack and his dance steps! I think that the jury will remain out on that one.

But let me start where I left off...


10th October Okay, its 1 AJ - that is, one day after Juaquin - maybe I was just light-headed anyway, but I went real, serious moped shopping. You see, my uncle Donny had a pal who was selling a wee moped that his son had had and had only done 2000 or so miles on it, so I was off to look at it. Well, what can I say, it was gorgeous, kinda black and kinda lovely and...okay the six pack didn't match up to Juaquin's but hey, it was lovely in its own way!

Another thing was that the guy was selling a helmet and chain and gloves and stuff - well, it was difficult for me to resist, since the helmet had some VERY attractive white and blue go faster stripes along it!! I said that I would buy it on the proviso that the other wee moped I was looking at 5pm that day wasn't any better - both the same price, except the 2nd one didn't have the go faster helmet thrown in. Aw Naw, says I, when I saw the 2nd one - I've never really had a decision making problem, but this one was tough for me - everyone I met, and I include siblings, parents, the postman, electricity meter guy, neighbours, strangers, heard my story - the SAME effin story over and over - oh my god, I was boring even myself...


12th October Okay, so I spend two whole days chucking the idea round in my head - 'Piaggio or Yamaha, Yamaha or Piaggio' ARGH!

...So, I bought my own helmet - minus the go faster stripes - and went to try out the Yamaha - it won, I bought it, decision made. It is so much fun - even in the chucking rain - well, apart from one wee hairy moment which I will come to later.

That night, I was supposed to go and see Tippi in Barfly, but I couldn't manage along...bummer - a couple of friends are off to travel the world and they were having a farewell do that night. However, if you are looking for some good music to listen to and enjoy then go and see her play - pretty cool stuff.


13th October Could I manage to get my insurance sorted out? I dunno, will the place be open on a Sunday? I dunno, I called them and YES, I can get my wee bike today - magic - my wee Yamaha Neo's is coming home! I collected it along with my brother-in-law Iain, and thought he might like to drive it SOME OF THE WAY, home to Glasgow. Aye right, I couldn't get him off it - we stopped at some lights and he shouted to us that he would just take it the whole way home if that was alright! Safe to say that Bomber Brown (as we call him) was loving it - how could I say no? He brought it home and was totally frozen and delighted. Funny how boys love such toys - dunno how I fit into that - but I do!

I drove all over Glasgow that day, frozen but happy, visiting Caitlin FOUR times in the day, before going up that night to watch the West Wing and Six Feet Under at her house (I don't have E4). It was magic.


15th October I managed to get all sorts of stuff for the bike, cover, gloves, chains, waterproofs and all that, but today was not a bike day...today was my first day at work - for almost 20 years incidentally!

Would I like it? Would it like me? How would I fit into an organisation (even as a consultant) on a daily basis? What exactly was I meant to do? Oh my god - help.

Well, I went in and it was absolutely MAGIC. I have been walking around with a huge grin on my face for two weeks - and no, that's not because of the g-force on my moped!

Seriously, I spent the time meeting people, having meetings and making suggestions and sharing ideas about future arts and spin events in and around Paisley. How tough is that...? Erm, not one bit. I dare say it will be very challenging in future, but for now, I am hanging around in Paisley, for three days per week, talking about me and my experience in the music business AND getting paid for it - excuse me, I must be dreaming. Its heaven and I am loving it.


17th October The end of a flipping great week at work and I had to go to Motherwell Civic Theatre to judge a Battle of the Bands competition. It sounds horrific, you know, even the word 'battle' is so negative and confrontational. However, it was nothing like that. For a start it was Big Stuart McLeod (Guitarist) who asked me to come along, so it was pretty certain that it was going to be civilised. As well as that, Stuart Cruickshank (BBC Radio Scotland's Programme Controller) was also judging, and what a lovely big guy he is.

Then there were the bands - six of them in total. And, how tough it was. Not all my kind of stuff, but here are all these young, new and fresh bands with oceans of talent playing their heart out on stage and wishing all the other contestants luck with their performances. The whole night had a great feeling of support and encouragement, not just for new musicians, but for oldies like me - I loved it and was totally high after witnessing such talent. Of course it was really difficult to choose who was to win, but in the end (in fact, I thought from the beginning) it was The Rodents - look out for them, they are pretty superb.


18th October Is that it then, is that my week of heaven over? Nice quiet nights in over the weekend and chill out, ready for next week at work...NO, I forgot...more gigs...MAGIC!

Well, it was Cumbernauld Theatre tonight. What a beautiful wee theatre it is. I realised too that the last time I played there was with Jane Weidlin opening for me acoustically - now that was a long time ago. And, Bill the sound guy, swears that it was only two 'okay maybe three' years ago - Sorry Bill but we're all getting on - it was a decade ago!!!!! Where does the time go?

Well, I don't know if its just because I was pretty high after the conducive effects of having a 'real' job, but wow, what a gig this was. I was all kinda giddy and high and having a wee laugh to myself and finishing songs where I felt like it and changing intros and stuff - I was in my own wee world, having a ball, loving singing and loving talking to the folk who had turned out to see us - which is okay if there aren't another four people on stage with you, wondering what the hell is going on.

Needless to say however, they all stuck with me and were professional to the end, succeeding, as ever, in making me look good - they are quite a stunning group of musicians - I am luck to be able to work with them!

Another really lovely thing happened too...Gwen Stewart was there...now Gwen used to sing backing with me, both live and on the album - First Disciple - as well as having her own successful, solo career...anyway, she is about to have a baby. I singled her out in the crowd and persuaded her - along with her huge bump - to come up and sing a song with us. It was a really defining and warm moment. I love her and wish her and Stephen well with the new addition, which should be here any day now. If she's half as good a mum as she is a singer, the wee one will be alright.

And, another tremendous thing - better than anything! Margo, who had missed a CL gig to go on her holidays (terrible I know) brought me back a bottle of Ouzo...all I have to say to that is...;laj sldkf wiedjjfkd alskd fje skdjkfl .zmvop; yejsk i widj by the way, thanx - hic!!!


20th October The day of the Billy Sloan session has arrived. Sadly Pamela couldn't make it along to sing with us, her mum aint doing too well and she wanted to be close - prayers are in my heart for you and yours Pam.

Anyway, arrived at Clyde and how chilled was that. Greg Kane was producing the session along with Jim who was assisting. We are famously quick when it comes to sound checks, no fuss, lets just do what sounds and feels right, can we see each other for cues and stuff and do we have all we need in the monitors. Well, that may be okay for a live show, but Greg was meticulous. It seemed the sound was wonderful across the airwaves, and in the room we played it was too. Can't thank him enough and maybe we will use that for a future release

Jo, who does this page, came too...she took loadsa photies - mostly of me - some of which look, er, interesting...have a look and see what you think. Mind you Jo, you should have got the guys in - and probably one of you and the band, that way, everyone would know EXACTLY what you look like - although, knowing Jo, she would have died of embarassment - acht well, when you hang out with the CL band, you have to be prepared for ANYTHYING.

Billy too...it is so good to have him back on the radio, he is a wonderful advocate of Scottish music. If only there were more like him, there would be a much stronger infrastructure within Scotland itself, allowing musicians to make their living, working here instead of HAVING to go to London or New York or LA. I'm not saying that its all doom and gloom here, its not, in fact its far from that type of scenario - all I'm saying is that it would be so much healthier if folk helped and supported each other a little more. Then the whole thing becomes self-fulfilling...

...anyway, get me off that soap box. Billy Sloan is a great guy and he's great for Scottish music and therefore all music - as is Stuart Cruickshank at the BBC. It is so good to turn on your radio and hear a live band playing. When did we move away from that - Why did we move away from that? I dunno, tell me your thoughts.

We got some lovely e-mails from folk while we were on air, some folk wondering about my moped, my job, the album - hopefully this will answer some of your questions.

Also, Billy put me on the spot and asked me which three albums I would take to a desert island - too tough to call although I did give three suggestions, mind you, they had changed by the time I got home. But what about you, what would your choice be - then I'll tell you mine...!

I'll get a copy of the Sloan Session and ask Jo to upload some samples on the page - maybe then, they could be hidden tracks on the new album.

So, that's me...I have had a brill couple of weeks, what with my new bike, my job and particulary the shows I have been lucky enough to play - its good to love life - LIFE is indeed FOR LIVING.

C ya next week for one of the shows, either in Edinburgh, St Andrews or London.

Carol

ps - what about the album, are you able to get it now?
pps - Also, I forgot to tell you about the hairy moment on my moped. I was coming out of the Clyde Tunnel in really heavy rain, you can imagine how it must have been - rain on my visor, dark, lights of on-coming in my face and a taxi driver who also felt like a wee backie on my bike - taxi, passengers and all! Well, yeah, I guess 28 miles per hour on a bend may have seemed slow when driving a warm, dry black cab, but see when you are driving a wee moped - its pretty fast - not to mention perfectly within the legal speed limit. Anyway, there's a really bad hole in the road just at the exit of the tunnel which I didn't see cos it was full of rain. I hit it and skidded all over the road. Thankfully, I managed to control the bike, otherwise, the taxi driver who wanted to share my backseat would have driven over me had I come off. As I said, thankfully I didn't come off, but gonni go easy on us wee moped drivers...it just might be me and wee Neo on the bike in front.




Saturday 28th September - Wednesday 9th October 2002

28th September Hmm...a nice quiet time - no shows just writing, washing, hoovering, dusting, sleeping, tuning quitars, applying for jobs and writing new stuff.

Still riding on the fantastic time at the Harbour Arts Centre which has given me some more inspiration for writing some new stuff. Three new tracks - My Goodbye, Unbreakable and Free - should be ready for some of the gigs and of course, the new Henry Gorman track - Honestly - that I have been playing at gigs is going down a storm. In fact I wrote some different lyrics for that track, but it looks like a band in London - MIM - are shopping Henry's version round record companies for a single release - fingers crossed for HG on that one.

I went to see the Devine Secrets of the Ya Ya Sisterhood, anybody else see it - or read the books? I don't want to tell you what I thought of it until you let me know what your thoughts were. Anyway, a nice thing happened at the movies - a person (CL Fan) told me how much he enjoyed my music and that he couldn't wait to get the new album...did I mention that it was my dad? No, seriously, when things like that happen, its magic, makes me feel all important and warm inside.


2nd October How did that happen - it was only July a minute ago...! It looks like the thing with the Paisley Partnership is going to work out...so, I started looking for some real transport - apart from my pushbike that is. You see, I refuse to buy a car...something about the environment and then parking and then road rage and stuff, that's not to say I don't get road rage on my push bike mind you. This is reminding me of a big ugly guy in a truck who pulled out in front of me, crossing my carraigeway and making me brake sharply. When I shrugged at him saying something like - 'what'd'ya do that for?', he stuck his two fingers up and drove off - perhaps posing in the CL picture in the front of Precious Little Victories - or perhaps not!!!

So...I went shopping for a moped - should have one soon...watch this space.


7th October Paisley for a photocall at Cochrane Castle School. The Paisley Partnership had secured funding for them to buy brass instruments for some of the primary school aged folks...imagine it...me in a classroom (panic) with 20 weans (paaaanic) all of whom were blowing brass instruments directly into my ears (death!). Now, don't get me wrong, I think its a wonderful initiative...you know...young folk finding confidence and talent through music and the arts - but see next time...gonni no ask me to pose for a photo with the kids are blowing trumpets into my ears...!

As if that wasn't mental enough, I rented a moped today to see how it was driving in Glasgow...! Even in the rain I wasn't put off...so the moped shopping continues.

Just to calm me down a wee bit, I went to see Glen Tillbrook (ex-Squeeze) in King Tut's - oh my god what a guy fest...I felt like I was at a Big Country gig where practically the whole audience was guys. I don't mind that except when you are trying to get past some folk who just weren't going to move. Some folk can be right wee jobbies.

Anyway, Glen was great, what a brilliant performer and songwriter...I hope to do some writing with him in the future.


8th October Got the letter from Paisley Partnership...they want me to work in Arts Development with them... 3 days per week. I am really excited about it. This way, I get to have my cake AND eat it. I start next Tuesday 15th, I'll let you know how it goes.

Returned the moped after having been stopped by the police who informed me that I had no licence plate...'oh' said I 'I've just rented it...what should I do'. 'Just return it to the shop' said the poliss 'and would you like a ticket?'. Hmmm...I did have to think about it...for about a nanno second...'no thanx' said I and off I went. Police with attitude and a sense of humour - David Blunkett IS the man for the job after all...!

Anyway, David picked me up to scoot through to Radio Scotland in Edinburgh for Brian Morton's t-time show.

Magic. Got there and all was well. Fancy nancy new premises for the BBC in Edinburgh. I think I prefer Queen Street mind you - you know, central and in that lovely big building. However, most importantly, so Lorraine the receptionist tells me is 'no shops, I can't even nip out for a wee look in Jenners'. Funny what makes our day...I think I'd be looking for the gadget or stationery shops.

Brian Morton was looking all chilled out and relaxed and reading some intellectual stuff for his show - is it just me or is that show really intellectual? You'd think I would know, you know, being an MA and all but sometimes I feel that the conversation is happening somewhere just above my head and I canny quite grasp it.

Brian, however, is fantastic. How can a radio presenter do all that stuff at once...have the producer speaking into his ear, look at the e-mails as they come in, think up questions for his guests, read the material he is working with...stop, I feel a nervous breakdown coming on...!

Actually, speaking of producer in you ear stuff...I remember presenting a radio show in Aberdeen called the Lemon Tree - I don't know if you heard it - but I did it a few times and, although I really enjoyed it, it was also really nerve wracking. So much so that I spoke at about a guzillion miles per hour...so, I wrote all over my script thingy, things like 'SLOW, CAROL, SPEAK SLOWLY'. Not only that, but I had told the producer about my penchant for speed speaking. So, all was fine, we were doing a live broadcast, I was SL-O-O-W-L-Y interviewing the singer from the Mutton Birds really SL-O-O-W-L-Y, and the producer came through thick and loud in my ear piece with a thick Aberdonian accent saying 'aye Carol, not quite so slow...' - ouch! Acht well, they asked me back to do another couple of shows so it couldn't have been too bad.

ANYWAY, I was on about the Brian Morton Show...Yep, Brian is so cool and smart and suave and clever and cool and stuff and when the first guest came on the line (Frank Wheelan from London), the transmission broke down and there was nothing to be done - goodbye smart, suave, clever and cool - 'aw naw...what are we going to do'. I was due on throughout the show but they came to me next and played Creep from the album, while the production team was trying desperately, to get Mr Wheelan back on the line - no luck! Brian & Co were panicking, asking if I didn't mind just doing whatever needed doing till the guy was back on the line - 'Nae Bother' says I. And that was it, I was on chatting to Brian, singing songs and - hopefully - carrying off a potentially dodgy 30 minutes of white space on the radio.

It was great, a couple of CLFans e-mailed in while I was on the show, which made me feel dead good and important. And, it really helped Brian that there was some live music there to keep things looking/sounding smooth. It was funny to see this cool guy all hot and bothered...not that you would hear that on the radio - like I say, he is really good, and when the fault was fixed Mr W was back on the line and Mr smart, suave, clever and cool was back behind the mic as though he meant for all that stuff to happen - kinda like Radio Scotland's James Bond...

By the time I got home, many people had e-mailed to say how much they enjoyed the show - thank you - I enjoyed it too.


9th October So, now its love dilemma time. I went to see the most amazing performance in the Armadillo building at the SECC. I watched Juaquin Cortes dance, accompanied by 18 musicians...it was an amazing thing of beauty. The music blew me away...it was a mix of strings, flutes, percussion and voice...for two hours, they played and he danced. He is indeed a thing of beauty. Not only because he has the most beautiful dancer's body...but also because it was as though the musicians all played the music, which was then absorbed by his body and then came out via the most tremendous movement. He lived it...it was part of him...AMAZING. I know I sound like an old hippy, but I couldn't get away with it. We were all jesticulating afterwards about how beautiful he was to watch, and about his amazing pecs and tummy...then Caitlin, my ten year old goddaughter threw the curve ball...

'if you had to choose,' she asked, 'who would you go out with - Juaquin Cortes or Robert De Niro. Wee rat I thought - and then it hit me harder - Naomi Campbell has 'gone out with' both of them...how unfair is that? Maybe if I was slenderer of thigh and of mind...like the song says...

Anyway, what would you do? Juaquin or Bobby D? Lemme know...

In the meantime...next weekend is looming - Cumbernauld Theatre on the 18th and Billy Sloan session on the 20th...either come along or tune in or both. I canny wait. As well as that, I should also have a new moped and a week with my new job under my belt...I'll let you know how it goes...

Thanks

Carol